Dealing with Depression(June 2016)

Many thought that I am one of those happy go lucky kinda guy that is very energetic,
but truthfully, have you ever heard of the term
"The person who laugh the loudest is actually the saddest"

Because that's basically me at the beginning

One of the biggest issue in any relationship is money is not enough and I am fortune enough to overcome that problem,

You see, I've spent most of my time working and working from Monday to Friday constantly helping Maxis Customer and cheering people day up,

But during Saturday and Sunday during my off days I will be alone.

There are days I will spend them with my parents, treating them dinner and sometimes even movies too,
There are times I will spend them with my friends too.

But what I really want is just a girlfriend to spend her time with me and to love me that's all.

You see, every year I made this 1 Wish and that one wish will always be the same is that:

"I wish I have a girlfriend that I love"

And that's my wish.
But somehow somewhere I've realized that what's the point of being so desperate?

Ever since my Ex left me I dint wanted to be alone,
I used to have sessions with befriender, talking to them about this issue,
Chat with my friends at work , or chat with friends on Facebook about it.

Messaging different girls at facebook hoping that they will reply me,
Waiting for them to reply me but eventually they dint.

I dint understand during that time, what is wrong with me?

I got the money,
I am not bad looking,
I got a steady career,
I got a nice car to drive and a place to stay.

So what's the problem of getting a girlfriend then?
Feeling depress and sad I just have to move on with life,

My parents they definitely know about it too, they say it's silly to think about things like this, but knowing that my Ex got a better relationship then me bothered me.

But with all the fake relationship I came across, all those internet scam that happened

In the end I've learn that it's okay to be single,
It's alright to be alone,

As long as you can do the things you like doing to make you happy then things will naturally.
There's no need to rush, because why rush,
Rushing will not help.

So what I did was, with the amount of money I have
I went shopping,
Dine at a luxury buffet
And even go for movies with nice seats all alone.

And those girls that I've send messages to on Facebook that they dint reply,
Whatever, if they dont reply just forget about them and move on..
I ain't that bad looking so just chill,

Just stay happy...
And learn to love yourself
And feel good about yourself
At the same time adapt to being alone.

I have faith that things will actually get better eventually,
Until then just work hard for a better future and continue helping people.